Listening Lovers October 2025

New Kinks & Fetishes

To submit your questions and thoughts please submit an email to info@ftloi.net 

What’s the most talked-about kink and fetish this month?

What is Sitophilia?

Sitophilia is a kink involving arousal from food, and is also commonly known as food play. It's not just about consuming food; it's about the sensual sensations that food can provoke. People engage in Sitophilia in many different ways and, with some research and caution, it can be quite enjoyable. Now you might be curious about why someone would choose to participate in this. Well it's similar to how people favor Jolly rancher flavors. Someone might like blue ones, green ones, all of them, or even none of them at all. Everyone has their own tastes. While food play might not appeal to you, it's certainly something that intrigues many people worldwide.

Are you interested in trying in food play but aren't sure what it involves or where to begin? Well it's really quite simple, it's all about getting creative with food and bodies. You could have warm, sticky syrup drizzled over you, with your partner tracing and licking every drop. Maybe you're considering that perfectly curved banana and know all the right spots for it to reach. Or perhaps it's just you and your partner, with one sitting in a cake and the other enjoys licking and eating it off afterwards. Some people enjoy spreading or placing food onto someone else, or even being the platter themselves. You might be more likely to see this at a play party or event, but why not try it on a random Thursday? However you choose to play with this, it can be a fun and memorable experience.

When bringing food into the bedroom, it's important to keep a few safety tips in mind. Cleanliness is essential, especially if you're using food for penetration. Treat the food like any sex toy—ensure it's clean and check for spoilage. If able, use cleansing wipes, cleaning spray, or antibacterial soap and water to remove dirt and germs. Pay attention to every detail as you don't want dirt entering your or your partner's body. Also, if you or your partner have a vagina, avoid using sugary foods like syrup or whipped cream internally as sugar can disrupt the pH balance and lead to infections.

When thinking of which foods to incorporate into your play there are some things to think about. Consider if it's spicy and how it might feel if it splits open. Be cautious of any sharp or pointy parts, like the small bumps on cucumbers or the pointed end of a banana. When using food for penetration, it's wise to cover it with a condom (even after washing). This will minimize the risk of infection and reduce the chance of abrasions, especially if the food has bumps or is pointy. This is particularly helpful for foods like bananas that might split or burst inside, potentially causing a mess. Also, think about the type of penetration you're planning. For anal play, choose something you or your partner(s) can grip well or ideally something with a flared end. Avoid using items like cherry tomatoes for anal use, as retrieving them can be difficult. However, for vaginal use this is less of a concern since the cervix will prevent them from going further, allowing you to push them back out.

There are endless ways to participate in this particular kink/fetish. It's not just about eating; it's about the sensual experience food can offer. People use all kinds of food, whether it be fruits, vegetables, desserts like cake or pie, or even a delicious syrup. Remember, safety is crucial when using food during sex. Emphasize cleanliness and make use of condoms to prevent infection as well as lowering the risk of abrasions.

Sasha Says

To submit your questions and thoughts please submit an email to info@ftloi.net 

This month’s top question from you!   

 What is the best type of lube to use when trying to conceive?

When you're attempting to conceive and trying to find new ideas or products that may help you, you'll find an endless wealth of information to sift through. This includes what to eat, what to avoid, vitamins to consider, and even suggested sex positions to "help boost conception." Despite all this, you likely still have many questions about upping your chances. As you search for products to enhance fertility or aid in conception, you'll encounter a variety of advertised options like herbs, vitamins, lubricants, medications, and treatments that might help. However, none can guarantee success.

One important thing to know is that there are many factors that can affect fertility including genetics, health issues, ovulation problems, low sperm count, age, and lifestyle habits like drinking and smoking. Fertility issues can occur not only to those who produce eggs, but to those who produce sperm as well. Sometimes, sperm might have trouble moving, known as a motility issue, meaning they might not swim well, if at all. Motility can range from 0-100%, but if it's below 40%, getting pregnant is often a bit tougher—not impossible, since it only takes one sperm to fertilize an egg, but it is definitely a bit more challenging. When sperm are making their way to the egg, they have to swim through cervical mucus so sometimes using a lube that matches its thickness, pH level, and texture could help. Healthy sperm typically have a pH level between 7.2 and 8, while the vaginal pH is often between 3.8 and 4.5. Lubes labeled as "fertility or conception boosters" typically have a pH around 7, which is more sperm-friendly.

When considering a "fertility-boosting lubricant", there are a few factors to consider. Are you using a lubricant now? If so, is it water-based, oil-based, silicone, or a mix? If you've been using one while trying to conceive, sticking with what you know might be best. However, if you haven't been using one, you might want to keep it that way. Making the decision to start using a lubricant or switching to a new one, can sometimes affect sperm and their movement. If the sperm's movement becomes impeded by the lubricant then you may have actually just lowered your chances of conception. Of course, if you feel you need a lubricant now and haven't used it before, then use the lube. Find a lube that may have a bit of a higher pH or pH level closer to that of sperm so the motility is not greatly impacted.

Trying to conceive can be challenging, and for some, it may not occur at all. Numerous factors can affect fertility, whether you produce eggs or sperm. Consulting a doctor and undergoing tests may reveal any unknown fertility issues. Remember when experimenting with any new products, exercises, or diets advertised to boost fertility, keep in mind that they may assist, but there are no guarantees. Products such as lubricants that claim to enhance fertility or aid in conception typically just create a more sperm-friendly environment. and often lack evidence of actually increasing your chances of conception.

We hope to help you and your partner(s) learn, grow, and enjoy together. Please submit your questions and we would love to be able to help answer them! Check back next month to see if others are wondering the same.

XOXO~Sasha